Ikea was a wee little man . . .

Well. It seems that my children have been spending a little too much time at Ikea. The other day MyLove and I heard C singing "Ikea was a wee little man and a wee little man was he. He climbed up in a sycamore tree ... And he said, "Ikea! You come down! For I'm gong to your house today." We have tried a few times to correct her and tell her that Zacchaeus is his name. But I think it's too much to think about while she is in the moment singing her heart out.

A couple years ago my mom said that C's voice sounds like music. She would tell me that one day she could be a singer. I did not agree because she didn't seem to be able to get the keys right and not only that she is so shy. I know that sounds funny thinking my 2 year old should hit the notes right, but I hear of these people who really have talent that just hear the notes and match them perfectly at such a young age. As a matter of fact, M used to do it all the time. He would hear a clock tone or some kind of ringing or elevator sound and make a sound to match the tone. Anyway . . . lately C has been singing her heart out while standing on the coffee table. It has been so cute. I so wish that family and friends could see this side of her. She is just so painfully shy around everyone (except for Mema and Papa!).

Here she is talking on the phone to Mema in a Belle costume (Thank you, Teresa, for all the costumes!!!)

A poopie day . . . with a great ending!

Today, the plan was for productivity, joy, excitement, unity, bonding . . . We had to run some errands and then we would get to meet a brand new human being who was born into this world just yesterday. Our really good friends just had their second child, a son.

What beautiful prospects.

Well, it didn't turn out that way. . . totally.

Woke up . . . late.

Dishes still in the sink. Behind already. Get them done.

Get the kids up . . . running around to get ready for the million and one errands to run. Why am I running around like a crazy woman?! This can't be that hard.

Package two large envelopes: one with a gift needing to be sent a week or two ago, the other to return fabric the seller incorrectly sent me (despite the fact that I ordered exactly what she listed: grrrr)

Make kids eggs. They're still hungry! What sweet thing can they all have, they ask. Bagels! We are going to Panera Bread! Please be patient!

Running late, running late.

Stop by neighbor's house unannounced to drop off some clothing . . . she's not there.

Go back home to drop off clothing so as not to tear, mangle, ruin them during the busy day.

Stop by other neighbor's house unannounced to drop off a gift meant for her Christmas 2010. How rediculous am I?!?! . . . she's not there either. Leave it under her doormat.

Talk to a different neighbor who's salvation I am praying for.

She praises my "well behaved" kids. I tell her I can't take credit. Psh, she says. Sure you can. No, I say. It's the Lord. I couldn't do it without Him nor would I know what in the world I was doing without Him.

She asks if I "hit" them at one point. I tell her, "yes, I spank them." She is shocked. She would never think I would "hit" my kids. We talk a bit more and I tell her how MyLove and I both believe in spanking and talking with our children. Telling them we love them. Also, we as individuals of our family are all ambassadors of not only ourselves but of the Ford family (and ultimately God, but I didn't share that this time) and it is their responsibility to uphold our name and we expect them to bring honor to us (and the Lord). It's a heavy burden, but they need to know we expect it at an early age. She notes that we have such good debates and we could go on but leaves me with a question for my hubby: Isn't it a confusing message to hit and tell the kids we love them? No, I say, because they know there are consequences to bad behavior and we care for them and want them to make good choices. There has to be swift and understandable repercussions for wrong behavior, especially violent/hurtful behavior. We are protecting them and we care about the decisions they make and will make. There is security in that.

We leave on a good note and look forward to more discussions. She says bye and the kids are, like always, quite shy and say few words, just as they did when they said hi. All of the sudden I am quite self-conscious thinking she is probably thinking that they are not open and lively and are quiet because they are fearful because I beat them . . .

Stop by post office. C almost has meltdown because she is upset that her outfit is making her hot. I wish my neighbor could see that my kids are quite normal and misbehave too.

Go to Shipley Do-Nuts for friends who just had their second child.

Stop by Target. E throws a fit because he can't have a do-nut right then. Almost falls to the floor in utter frustration numerous times. My cart is ridiculous and loud and all attention is on this crazy woman walking so fast with a melting-down son hanging onto a scraping-loud cart.

Pick out few items. Kids talk about original plan for only one item. I tell them that's enough and to not complain.

Get back in van. Kids ask for do-nuts again and I make them wait 'til after Panera Bread.

Arrive at Panera Bread. Unload. Attended by not so nice girl behind counter who is quite miffed that I am ordering so many bagels and ask her questions like, "Do you have cinnamon crunch bagels?" "Can you toast those?" "Do you have jalepeno cheese bagels." I order some pastries as well. She gives my whole order in a paper sack with no handles even though I am holding a little one, have a large order and this bag is cumbersome.

Get MyLove's sandwich, go back to the original counter and a sweet ray of sunshine of a girl kindly responds to my request for a large bag and helps me put everything in. God, please bless her for her act of kindness. As for that other girl . . . well, nevermind.

Load back in van. Pass out bagels and do-nuts to kids. C is quite sassy with me still. Give her the yummy treats anyway and tell her I am not proud of the way she has behaved and she tells me that she is going to tell my mommy on me (something she has been saying the last three days to my amusement, but at this moment was quite too sassy. The boys pipe in and say that Mema would not agree with her anyway and say that she is not being a good girl).

Drive swiftly to Med Ctr. to pick up MyLove.

Stop by Smoothie King to get our friends some liquid energy. It takes f o r e v e r .

Arrive at the hospital 2.5 hours later than originally planned.

Our friends are tired, but so happy with the treats. Baby boy is just precious. MyLove and I take turns holding him. What joy!!! What salve for the heart and soul babies are. Oh, I just give glory to the Lord for these special gifts called children . . .

Our E and C fight almost the whole time about what chair they want to sit in. Not enough room. Someone's touching the other. One rocking in the loud glider. G wanting me to hold her. Touching the ground. Needing to go potty. Trying to hear the birth story. The kids arguing louder. C kicking her brother and in complete defiance of any instruction I give her.

I end up giving her two spankings in the bathroom . . .

We all leave.

Go to MyLove's office . . .

Kids spinning in chairs and running around cubicles as I try to talk to MyLove's boss's boss about her daughter and son and painful, gut-wrenching decisions she is having to make with them.

Go to HEB to pick up some veggies and pizza for night with Uncle Daniel. Just shy of $3 off gas coupon.

Come out to waiting hubby and kids and find a $3 off coupon floating by on the ground! Thank You, Lord.

Get gas.

Come home.

Uncle beat us. We are late again.

MyLove and I have small tiff because I am emotional and again, ridiculous, and got my feelings hurt.

We talk, kiss, laugh. Everything is fine.

Eat.

Put G in our bathtub without water to play while I rinse off my feet in shower (I'm anal about feet). I am right next to her with only glass between us. What could happen?

Get out and find that she had POOPED in the tub and was playing with it. Wait! She already pooped today! What's happening?!?! It is all over her body and hair and on the toys and she was at that moment poking her finger in and out of it. How quickly havoc can be wreaked! I grab her hand before she can put it in her mouth. Let go of her hand to grab some toilet paper! She sticks her hand in her mouth. I grab it. Do I hold her? Take her out? I tell C to get me some toilet paper. I wipe G's hands and grab a whole lot of toilet paper and scoop/wipe up as much I can and wash out the tub and toys and as much of G. Fill tub with clean water and tons of lavender bath soap. Bathe girls. Get them to bed.

Have the best fellowship with Uncle Daniel. We skip the movie and talk about the goodness of the Lord. Freedom in Christ. The simplicity of just knowing Jesus. The pureness of stripping away unnecessary doctrine. Our need of Him. The answer to all of our needs being to turn to Him. Always. Forever. He just wants us to come to Him. That is the beginning of understanding and the foundation of the Christian life.

Hallelujah. We give glory to Jesus.

Well. I told you it was a poopie day! Literally! But, the Lord showed His mercy and grace throughout. I asked MyLove at one point in the van together for prayer. I needed peace in my heart. I was so anxious and on edge. Of course he did, and it encouraged me, but I know what the Lord wanted was for me to go to Him with every anxiety.

I just love Jesus so much. There are so many verses I should quote right now and reference, like: be anxious for nothing but in everything by prayer and supplication make your requests known . . . pray without ceasing . . . it is for freedom that Christ has set us free . . .

but I am tired and lazy . . . I know that that's so pathetic.

Anyway. Goodnight. I'm desperate for sleep!

My Mama and My Sista

This past Monday, my fantastic mama and my wonderful sister and I went out to celebrate my Mom for her Mother's Day. Because of various conflicts of schedules and me needing MyLove home to watch our little babes, we celebrated three weeks late.

Well, it was a splendid time we had. Just splendid. I praise the Lord for the women in my life. Oh, how I love and appreciate them.



My mom, well, she is just the perfect specimen of a mother.
She is:
so loving,
a faithful prayer warrior,
a devout follower of Jesus,
selfless beyond measure,
generous to a fault,
energetic,
dedicated,
tiny,
outgoing,
a grandmother of 14!!!,
oh, so friendly (so that she has never met a stranger),
outspoken with her motto, "Love Conquers All!!!!"
and just downright awesome.

My sister, well, she is just a wonderful sister.
She is:
protective,
giving,
a social butterfly,
a follower of Jesus,
beautiful,
a faithful friend,
a mother of nine,
a grandmother of 2!!!,
caring,
and so special to me.

My sister is also moving to Guam :-( She has just sold their house. Her hubby is already in Guam because of his job. I have been so emotional about it all. Every weekend, we have tried to have at least one nephew/niece spend the weekend with us so that we can have quality one-on-one time with them. I end up falling apart each time and MyLove has to hear me sob and express my feelings.

Anyway!

This celebration was full of fun, laughter, tears, laughter, coffee, great food, fun, and laughter.

We started off with a quick stop to Starbucks. We got fueled up on that coffee been nectar then my sister took us to Harwin to do some serious purse shopping. We were hooked up with some great deals and an interesting ordeal with me finding a little wristlet with money in it and going back to the original shop (long story) to return it to the owner only to have her approach us telling us she was called and informed that I had purchased a purse with her money in it and me trying to tell her that I knew and I was going to give it to her and her saying she believed me and me not really knowing if she believed me . . .

Did that make sense?

Probably not.

I'm such a nerd.

Later, we went to another store and I called MyLove with all the details and his preciousness prayed with me over the phone and Oh, the peace that comes from the Lord, and Oh, the preciousness of my best friend, who is my husband, who is always there for me. He is truly my soul mate. I know I say that a lot. But, it's the truth.

One good thing about the above interaction at the purse shop is I got to try my best to tell a gentleman about Jesus in Spanish. Boy, does my Spanish need a lot of work. But, the man showed he understood and I tried my best to understand him. He said he knew Jesus. But, you know? A lot of people say they know Jesus. The question is, are you following him?

Anyway, we went to PF Chang's for dinner and just laughed so much and took pictures and made sillies of ourselves. We even found out our waiter had Chamorro blood! (His grandmother was from Guam!!!)

Then we drove home and my little babes were so happy to greet me. I modeled my new purses and sunglasses to the family who ooh'd and aah'd and made me feel like the most special mommy in the world. M even told me that I looked like a secret agent which had to be one of the best compliments ever . . . given my lifetime desire to be in the CIA (pre-kids of course, but I still like to act like I could actually be some kind of secret agent. It's now a running joke to my family.)

I had bought a purse for C and I so wish I had a camera when she saw it. She had pulled my things out of the shopping bag and I told her to wait when she got to hers because I was still telling MyLove of our adventure. Then, I handed her her purse and her reaction was just priceless. She hugged it to her chest, closed her eyes and just squealed. She was so excited and couldn't put it down.

Here she is the next morning. She kept asking me to take a picture of her wearing it.


MyLove had to get to bed quickly so the girls and I went to the living room and hung out on a sleeping bag just 'til MyLove went to sleep. As we sat there, G walked around me in circles and kissed me over and over again. The bliss of this is so hard to put in words. She is only 16 months and having her initiate kisses just melted my heart. She really missed me, poor thing. What a terrific end to a most precious day with my mom and sister celebrating my mom's Mother's Day.

Dear, Jesus. Why have you blessed me so much? You are so good to me and I am so undeserving. Not only did You die for me, but You continue to shower me with your blessings and Your goodness. I pray that my life will just shine for you!!!

C's Sewing

Well, for C's 4th birthday, we got her her very own Hello Kitty sewing machine. I know it seems like she would be way too young, but I believe that this is something that she can learn, at least get familiar with. My mom taught me when I was young as well. And, besides, children in the Philippines get machetes to cut down branches and wood as children! I truly believe that children should be exposed to "dangerous" things, like knives and fire, in the proper context to develop the proper respect for them.

Wow, what an excited little girl she was. We set it up and she sewed her first lines on her own machine. I remember sewing around the time she was two and she would take the pins and put them back into the pin cushion. How scary! But, she caught on fast. She stuck herself a couple of times, but she learned. Then, I let her sit in my lap and help me feed the fabric through the machine. Oh, she just looved it.

Since then, she has asked over and over if she can sew. So, I know a sewing machine would be a fun gift. Since she received it, I have let her use it only about two or three times, but boy does she love it.

Well, the other day, I was so busy with schooling and trying to finish an order (Thanks, Kerri!) and C saw my sewing machine set up downstairs just waiting for someone to use it. She came running in and asked:

C: Mommy, can I sew?
Me: No, Sweetie. Not right now.
C: But, I want to! I want to make a shirt.
Me: [pause] Ok, but you can't make a shirt. I have to teach you how to sew first.
C: I already know how to, remember?
Me: You can sew some lines, but not a shirt yet.
C: Pleeease, Mommy. I just want to sew.
Me: Ok, go ahead, but be careful!

My nerves got bunched up as I let her go to the other room while I stayed by the computer helping Martini. I have a bin with a whole bunch of scrap fabrics that she uses, and after some time, she came running in . . .

C: MOMMY!!! Look! You were wrong! See, I told you I can sew a shirt! (she says holding up three pieces of fabric sewn beautifully in a line, much to my amazement)
Me: Wow, that is beautiful! How did you do that?
C: (holding it up to her chest) I sewed it! See, Mommy. You were wrong!
Me: Well, you are right! I was wrong! You did sew! You did a good job! But, that is not a shirt. (I say, bursting her bubble, but not quite)
C: I'm going to make it into a shirt! See?! I sewed!

Oh, She was so proud. And, honestly, I was so proud of her. She somehow connected end to end three pieces of fabric. It is a simple thing to do, but I never showed her how. She is just one determined, feisty, independent little thing, and I love her so much!!!

My Ministries

About a year and a half ago, I was lovingly asked to be a part of the women's ministry at our church. It was going to be for the summer session of 2010 and I was honored. But, I had not had G yet. MyLove and I prayed about it and decided it was not a good idea as I would have to make a firm commitment and doing that with a newborn was unrealistic for us. We definitely cherish and savor those first months with baby. I told them that maybe the following year I could.

Well, it's been over a year and I brought it up to MyLove again feeling the itch to get out there and serve. I want to get out there with other women and learn how to minister, listen, share godly truths, use scripture appropriately, lead effectively in the Word . . . I want to be effective!!!

So, MyLove and I talked and he told me he would pray and he told me to pray too.

A few weeks passed. I prayed and asked that the Lord would give us one mind and that He would lead MyLove clearly.

I randomly mentioned to MyLove how excited I was and how I was looking forward to being stretched. But, seriously, no pressure!

Then, one day, I asked MyLove if he had any leading from the Lord. He tells me that he hadn't prayed much and had forgotten! He needed more time.

Then about a week later, I asked him again while we were getting ready for bed.

MyLove: You know, Babe. I just believe that your ministry is here. The kids, our family. It would be a big commitment and it would take a lot of time away from the family.
Me: Babe. I know. I wondered about that. But, I was looking forward to being stretched and learning more.
MyLove: Honey, I just don't have a peace about you doing it. Maybe it's just a season. But, the kids and I need you here. With school and just everyday things, you are so busy already.
Me: I know. It's just that sometimes I feel like I am so busy doing the mundane that I am rendered useless. I know that is rediculous because I am obviously not doing useless things. But, I long to be stretched doing things with my mind and learning new things from others. But, I agree, Babe. This is not the time.

So, I prayed. I prayed that the Lord could use me and thanked Him for the ministry of my husband and the ministry of my children. What freedom to pour my heart into them and enjoy it! What a gift! What responsibility!

Then, the most amazing thing happened. That very week, I took a walk with the kids and talked with a neighbor for around an hour and a half. We spoke about many things. I was able to tell her the gospel in full! I explained what it means to become a Christian and how believing that Jesus is real is not enough. We must choose to follow Him! She struggled with how exclusive it is to say that Jesus is the only way. And, I told her that it isn't me saying it. It is the Word of God. "[Jesus] is the way, the truth, and the life. No one can come to the Father but by [Him]" -John 14:6. MyLove met up with us after he got home and so lovingly prayed and occupied the kids during this precious time. What a tagteam we were! She told me she looked forward to continuing our discussion in the future.

That same week, I was able to minister to a dear neighbor with love and a meal. I was able to give glory to the Lord for giving me the strength to have our four children care for them and homeschool.

And, again that very week, our pest control guy, the same guy we have had for six years, came by. His mother just died and he was devastated. They were such buddies, he and his mother. I talked openly about his need for salvation. I urged him to turn to the Lord. He knows where we stand as we have told him the gospel various times, but this time it was different. He asked me where his mother was now. I told him the Lord knows, but that he would go to hell if he did not turn to Jesus. Oh, the struggle in his heart. I told him to let go of whatever he was holding onto! It wasn't worth it compared to what he would have in Jesus." I know. I know," he would say. But, he admitted it was too hard to let go of the things he loves in this world. Oh, how it tears at my heart. He is an older gentleman. Overweight. Diabetic. with other health issues. I told him today is the day of salvation! Don't think you can make that decision on your death bed. "The last thing I want to hear is that you've keeled over in someone's lawn dead from heatstroke! I would feel like a failure knowing that your soul was lost forever." I spoke with tears and he saw my pain for him. But, he told me he wasn't ready. Gambling and such were too hard to let go. He would think about it, he says. He even said that he knew the Lord wants him to turn to him, but he wasn't ready. Oh, the urgency for one's soul! On the cusp of eternity!

But, in reality, that is where we all stand. On the cusp of eternity. The question is will it be an eternity in heaven with The Almighty, or in hell in bitter torment?

I shouldn't be here, really. When I lost Lael, I hemorrhaged and needed five blood transfusions. I never would have thought this would happen. It was so unexpected. When I went out (asleep/unconscious) I had no idea what was going on. A hundred years ago I wouldn't have made it. But, when I was told this after I awoke, I had such peace! I would have been with my Creator. My Savior. My Redeemer! How can people live without hope? They need to know.

So, as I recounted all these things to MyLove, I cried. I was thankful to MyLove for being such a great leader and not giving in to my desires even if they were soaked in "good intentions." I gave glory to the Lord for giving me my desires. He stretches me and gives me ministries outside the home through relationships, namely nonbelievers. I just love nonbelievers, and Jesus knows that! And you know, that is how ministries work anywhere else, through relationships. The difference is, the Lord opened my eyes to the fact that my ministries are my everyday life. Giving Him glory in all things, to all people and just being there for them. I know their deepest need. Even if they don't. And, I know Who can fill that deepest need. I know Him intimately.

Hallelujah! I will forever praise You, Jesus!

Guess who's Walking!

After so much practice with her daddy, G is finally walking!

We are so excited that she gathered up all her courage and took those exciting steps.

G has been walking four or five steps here and there, but nothing really substantial. Tonight, G too MyLove's and my hand and we walked briskly in a big circle around the house over and over. Then, we decided to stop in the living room and had her walk to me then back to MyLove.

Oh, she was so excited. By the end of the night she was walking all around. What a joy it was to see. The kiddos were jumping up and down and squealing as they watched her. They clapped and cheered her on. C tried and tried to get her to walk to her, but G would turn or just avoid her to get to Mommy or Daddy. It was so funny. The boys were so loving to her.

We love you, Sweet G! You are awesome!!!

Thank You, Lord, for this new chapter in G's life!

The Investment of Time

"Mommy, when do I get to have my alone time with you?"

This is a question I have been hearing a lot lately. Around the end of 2010 and early 2011, I felt so burdened to spend some alone time with each of my precious babes. With M in the throes of his first year virtual schooling and with G still an infant, my time was so limited and I could see the effects of it on the kids. I felt sad. Time just kept flying by.

So, I prayed and the Lord blessed with the grand idea to have a bit of time with each child on some day of the week. I shared it with the kids and they were elated. We set what day each of them would have time with me on . . . and . . . we did it . . . ONCE! Each of them had their time with me and then I got sidetracked with the holidays or the new year, or something.

Well, I have been feeling the burden a lot lately, namely because the kids have asked when we were going to start our "alone time" again. So, this week I told them we would do it. How excited they were :-( Poor things.

M has Mondays. E has Tuesdays. C has Wednesdays, and G has Thursdays.

Sometime in the day we try to find a block where I can spend about 30 min. with my special babe. The others have to go upstairs and not come down for anything unless it is an emergency. We try to plan it when G is sleeping, but inevitably she ends up joining us and the kids are fine with it! They totally understand. They're just excited that the focus is on them at that time.

On Monday, M made his "famous chocolate milk" and I had my coffee. We sat and ate pastries (actually, I ended up eating all three with G eating a bite or two) and talked all about his latest drawings in great depth. He has such history and detail to each of the thirty or so drawings on his papers. We then talked about getting him a nice, leather journal where he can draw all of his pictures and keep all his "top secret" info in. He really liked the idea.



On Tuesday, E had warm chocolate milk and of course I had my coffee and we enjoyed some toast. E told me all about his favorite things and asked me what mine were (just like we had done in our first alone time). We also played some tic-tac-toe and a few rounds of hang-man. What fun! Afterward he read me the book I Like it When and oh, what a great job he did. I was so proud of him!!! I am reminded of how MyLove taught him how to read when I was pregnant and bedridden with Lael. MyLove was so patient and consistant with him.


On Wednesday, C and I both had some coffee. She looooooves coffee. Even bitter coffee! She loves tea too! She asked for a Nutella sandwich. We sat and colored a particular page of her Hello Kitty coloring book. She was so diligent in her manner. She colors so well. Quite methodical for a wee one. And, yet, sometimes she can just scribble and be crazy. We had great conversation too.

Here C is with her cousin Anthony. She loves him very much. They have a special bond.



Today, I never did have my "alone time" with Giselle, and the kids felt so bad for her. But, I didn't so much. We get a lot of time together nursing and sleeping together and diaper changing. I have to tend to her the most, although we don't have playtime or reading time together too often. That is what I hope to do with her.

I caught her here at the table playing with crayons. She had thrown them everywhere, but look at how precious she is with her belly resting on the table!!! It cracks me up!


Oh, what a blessing these times are!I realize that these things we did are things the kids are constantly asking me to do with them, but I am always telling them to "hold on" or "in a minute" or "later." I feel so torn. Schooling is definitely a priority and has such a pull. Meals, cleaning, diaper changing, laundry and such are always tugging.

But, these precious moments of time I can have with my little babes are so very important. I already feel like this week has gone better even though other things have had to be put off for those moments. My relationships with them I can tell have already benefited. There is more peace and rapport. We have had a more positive atmosphere. The kids just seem happier. Maybe they are feeding off me. Maybe I am just more at peace because of these precious blocks of time getting to know each of them.

The investment of time in them faaaar outweighs duties. My duties are there, but really, they always will be and they will get done. Whenever we have a gathering, I am forced into high-gear and get tons done. Surely I can do that for my little babes!

Thank You, Lord, for time. I see how much I long to invest time in my children and in turn see how much you long to invest and spend time with us. The investment of time with You faaaaar outweighs anything! Thank You for allowing me to come to Your throne all day long through prayer and praise. Thank You for feeding me Your Word in so many ways other than sitting and reading like the podcasts, radio, music, memory, and other believers. You are so good to me. I give you glory, honor and praise.